New Year Resolutions

Not to be someone who does not enjoy a good party…New Year resolutions are mainly about temporarily lifting spirits without much long term change. Like the old joke, “stopping smoking is easy, I’ve done it many times,” resolutions are easily made and quickly forgotten. Not that you shouldn’t make New Year resolutions or make a personal commitment to stop smoking, since the frustration that comes with start and stop commitments may eventually lead to deeper insights about the process of behavior change.

People make New Year resolutions about changes that may have a dramatically positive effect on their lives. These items may include losing weight; stopping smoking; getting “in shape;” improving health; getting a better job; making and saving more money; stopping or reducing alcohol consumption, and stopping drug use; better anger control; improving self-confidence; and improving interpersonal and family relationships.

These goals may be difficult to implement because the problematic old habits they could replace have lots of “inertia,” because they have been so well rehearsed for many months or even years. The “inertia” may make us feel that the old problematic habits happen “automatically,” with little thought or energy necessary to keep the old problem habit in place.

When we give a negative habit up we create a gap or an emotional vacuum, which can only be replaced with another hopefully more positive habit. A good example of this is how people react when they go on a diet or stop smoking. Typically, people may react with frustration or lower mood, until two things happen. First, the old habit is weakened, and second, a new, positive replacement habit becomes “automatic.”

I have a problem with the idea of a diet. To me, a diet is a recently instituted food intake protocol, usually established to cause weight reduction. How often do we hear about unhealthy “yoyo diets” where people have lost lots of weight only to regain the weight once the diet has ended? The reason this happens is because a diet by definition is a temporary behavior; not a new habit.

Only new, hopefully more positive habits can replace old problematic ones. Since the old problematic habits became relatively permanent over time because they were well rehearsed, it will take some time to develop positive replacement habits. This means that New Year resolutions may make us feel better, but unless we are able to have a plan for the development of replacement habits we may not succeed.

Habit modification plans commonly include details for approaching a goal realistically and establishing supportive relationships, both of which may enable consistent progress. The emotional support some weight reduction, drinking and drug programs offer coupled with the teaching of what constitutes realistic progress may greatly benefit participants by extending their efforts to the point that new permanent positive habits have replaced older problematic habits. Additionally, these programs emphasize effective means for dealing with “setbacks,” and offer encouragement for reestablishing consistent progress.

Nothing is more important than the mind set of “taking it one day at a time.” This mind set contrasts with the New Year resolution mindset, which implies that an entire year’s worth of change may come from the resolution per se. An entire year’s worth of change realistically comes from the ability to daily ask ourselves: “how did I do today with respect to my goal.” Taking it one day at a time realistically focuses us on the new behaviors we must implement daily, and alerts us to when we were not consistent with our goal. Nothing compares with the solid feeling of accomplishment a good day of progress brings. Psychologists tell us that positive reinforcement is essential to change.  Success brings more success. Taking it one day at a time makes us alert and aware. Change comes from awareness not frustration.

Happy New Year!

Previous Lake Placid articles may be viewed at: www.drhavlicek.com/articles

Raymond Havlicek

Lake Placid, NY